I'm also finding myself crazy attracted to a guy who I believe is attracted to me as well. The problem is he doesn't know everything about me and there are certain things that I think that if he were to find out he would run. He;s kind of a bible thumper...to the max. Which I like, for the most part. I love that he's got such a strong faith in God but at the same time it makes me worried about my own faith. Also, I feel as though he admires my faith but he thinks that it is stronger than it is. I'm not sure how strong it is.
oh well, I'm not allowed to date in Nebraska anyway...says all of my closest people in WI
I recently moved to Omaha, Nebraska for a job that I love more than life. In the past month and a half I have visited WI twice and my bff has visited me once. I was supposed to go up there today but forgot that I made plans with my host parents for Thursday so then i decided to go up Thursday after our plans, which are in Des Moines so I'd already be on the way.
Unfortunately I have run out of money and have an opportunity to make some Saturday and Sunday so I decided to just not go to WI at all.
When I told my bff she started crying, when I texted her bf, who is pretty much a member of my family, he knew and was angry at me....apparently he now is hearing about it from Megan(bff) and my G ma. Everyone is mad at me for situations beyond my control.
(ND for short)
and right before we had our warm ups velocity (my guard) went to watch their show.....and it was all about this little girl who was talking to her dead father about how much she missed him.
I have no idea why but it hit me....HARD.
I was thrown for a loop the entire night and into the next day. finally this morning I was finally back to being myself and one of my instructors had the great idea to call me to see why I wasn't myself on Sunday.
so then it brought it all back and I'm back to being down and out.
I liked it better when my instructors had no idea why I was out of the loop.....they didn't need to know how personally I took that show.....or how close to home it struck.....and now I need to bounce back!
So I was recently made aware of a job opening in Nebraska teaching colorguard.
I am obsessed with colorguard, it is my life and my passion and there is nothing I would rather do for the rest of my life.
So I applied for the position. I sent in my resume and fit everything that the band director wanted.
The Problem: I live in Wisconsin, I have only ever marched in Wisconsin. The band director does not understand why someone with the experience I have would want to move to Nebraska to teach colorguard. he underestimates my passion for the activity. He also wants to see me teach which would mean that I would have to go down for an interview...which would suck because I am poor and don't want to go down until I go down for good.
I really want this position, even though it is a crazy idea. I would have to take time off of school (I'm a music education major in Wisconsin), I would have NO health insurance, it would be the longest I have EVER been away from Wisconsin.
It would also be a great opportunity, and if I wait until after school I ffear that I will have too many commitments. and that it will not be as convenient as it would be now.
basically I am unsure, I am unsure that I will get the job and I am unsure that I will accept it.
